My hope for you this New Year is my hope for myself: that we will come to know ourselves more deeply and to love ourselves well. 

That this commitment to self-knowledge and self love will heal our relationships with ourselves which will inevitably help us heal our relationships with others and the world.

To do this work we must commit to a few things.

We must decide that we are worth knowing intimately. 

We must decide that what we feel about anything and everything, what we like, what we hate, where our passions lie is all critical information. 

We must decide that showing up for and with ourselves in every moment is our life’s work and our most important responsibility. 

We must commit to having our own backs. 

We must own our feelings and experiences without feeling compelled to justify them to others. Unless we’ve harmed someone with our behavior, then we must own our behavior and make amends.

We must prioritize ourselves in every relationship. 

We must accept what is and what is not within our control. We must relinquish the responsibility we feel for the feelings of others. 

We must set and hold boundaries that honor and respect what we need and who we are even when it’s uncomfortable, especially when it’s uncomfortable. 

Above all else we must practice self compassion and make space for our own, flawed, delightful, unique humanity.

You can learn more about the social/essential self framework in Martha Beck’s revelatory book, Finding Your Own North Star.

Meet me here and on Instagram weekly for more posts about healing our relationships with ourselves, each other and the world. I welcome your comments, thoughts and experiences. Thank you for being here.