Setting Boundaries: Mistaken Belief vs. The Truth
A few thoughts to help you care for yourself well and set healthy boundaries as you wrap up your week!
Mistaken belief: Other peoples’ feelings are my responsibility.
Truth: My feelings are my responsibility, others’ feelings are their responsibility. Taking care of ourselves is our responsibility and our birthright.
Mistaken belief: Feeling good about myself, feeling worthy of love and belonging is dependent upon how others feel about me.
Truth: I am my safe space. I am worthy of love and belonging because I exist. If someone has feelings about me choosing myself, those feelings do not indicate that I am bad or wrong or unworthy of love.
Mistaken belief: If I set a boundary with someone I care about, it will harm our relationship.
Truth: It may change your relationship. It may be uncomfortable and you may get pushback. If change occurs, it’s for the best. It means you are showing up in the relationship too, rather than allowing it to be one sided. Someone who is interested in and able to have a healthy relationship with you will expect you to have boundaries, just as they have their own.
Mistaken belief: I must anticipate what others are thinking/feeling about me so I can adjust my behavior accordingly.
Truth: The most important information you have to base your behavior on comes from within you. You are the authority of your life. It is you who must be consulted.